Using Gender Differences to Your Advantage

LOVE ~ Our Finest Desires and Our Fondest Hopes

LOVE IS LABOR: Love is the will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own spiritual growth or another’s spiritual growth.

SELF-DISCIPLINE AND COURAGE: The work of love is paying full attention and so much of that is real listening. Scott Peck reminds us that two things are required for us to learn to pay attention to our finest desires and our fondest hopes: discipline and courage. Personal growth is a complex, arduous and lifelong task. Love is the fuel on the road less traveled. Peck describes how self-discipline is necessary to cope with the difficulties of life. Love is presented as the motive and reward for self-discipline.

UNDERSTANDING: Love is that feeling that no matter what happens or what the other person does, somewhere in your heart, you will find a way to forgive or understand them.

INTERDEPENDENT: Love does not require that you cannot envision yourself living without the other person. We are neither codependent nor independent.

GROWTH: Love is that you want to see and help the other people grow.

WORK: Love involves effort and will, and is not a passive process. This is the essence of what is meant when we hear: “You have to work on your marriage.”

Intimate Love for Men and Women

GENDER DIFFERENCES: John Grey started out his formidable work on gender differences in his Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus books and programs. With this clear delineation of the forms of love which naturally suit men’s and women’s needs in an intimate relationship, the first lesson in how to make your mate feel loved is very clear. This removes the clumsiness of giving your best (usually what you need yourself) and labels six types of interaction which ensure your partner feels loved by you.


Men’s Emotional Needs
Trust in Him
Acceptance of Him


Women’s Emotional Needs
Caring Behaviors
Attention & Listening


For one of the full descriptions of coming together as men and women without the negative beliefs of our current lives, Jeff Brown, Author, Filmmaker and Grounded Spiritualist has written two significant documents:
Apologies to the Divine Feminine
Apologies to the Sacred Masculine (the letter this warrior-in-transition would like to receive)